⁴ Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

⁵ Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

⁶ Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

⁷ Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

⁸ Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. 1Corinthians 13:4-8

This verse describes the characteristics of true love. These qualities can certainly be found in the person of Jesus Christ, and they can be found in all truly loving relationships. The problem with trying to “find” love in our dating lives, is that too often we don't look for these characteristics. Rather we look at physical appearance, popularity, or wealth. These are not the qualities that God looks at and neither should we.

And the Lord said unto Samuel, How long wilt thou mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? fill thine horn with oil, and go, I will send thee to Jesse the Bethlehemite: for I have provided me a king among his sons. 1Samuel 16:1

Love is best seen as devotion and action, not an emotion. Love is not exclusively based on how we feel. Certainly our emotions are involved, but they cannot be our only criteria for love. True devotion will always lead to action—true love.

¹⁸ My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. 1John 3:18

Christ was devoted to us enough to give his own life for us (Romans 5:8), even when he didn't feel like it (Matthew 26:39).

Sex is not love! Our culture has taught us that sex and love are one in the same. This is a lie. Sex is a beautiful God-given activity that is wonderful when practiced within the boundaries of a Biblical marriage. Sex is the completion of the binding of two people within Biblical marriage; it is a God-given gift.

PRE-MARITAL SEX

Because premarital sex is not love, it only leads to pain and disappointment for those who are seeking that love. The Bible says that when two people are married, they become one flesh (Ephesians 5:31). Sex is consummation of that union. When two people break off their relationship after having sex, it is like ripping apart flesh. This is why twoteenagers will struggle so much and become so dependent on those they give their bodies to. In light of I Corinthians 13:4-8 (above), it is easy to see that premarital sex is not patient, it is not kind, it does not protect, it is self-seeking. It is not love!

IDENTIFYING TRUE LOVE

We can only identify true love and know when we have found it, based on the Word of God. When we match our relationships up to what the Bible says that love is—and we are honestly prepared to make a life-longcommitment to that person—then we can say that we are truly “in love.” The three keys to that statement are:

We have to…

1. …look at the Word of God
2. …be completely honest with ourselves
3. …understand the level of commitment that comes with true love